Why Can’t I Write, It’s My Night Off!!!!

Due to the resurfacing of one of the sports halls at the Leisure Centre, tonight’s karate classes were cancelled, which is great, I get a night off for once, I don’t have to rush down my tea and shoot off for 2½ hours of teaching, yeah, I can write, I can write loads, I can spend the night writing poem after poem, oh yes.

OH NO!!!!!

A big fat creative nothing, all day I’ve had words and phrases pinging around my head that sounded great and lots of ideas as I went about my work, I was so excited to have a night off and spend it writing.

But almost as soon as I got home I fell asleep, until a knock at the door awoke me, then after tea I watched the end of Senna, the documentary about Ayrton Senna, Ben had put it on before I got home, then I picked up one of my notepads, tried to write, nothing, then I picked up my phone, thinking I’d tap it straight into there, nothing would come together, nothing I was happy with, so I went back to sleep.

It seems if I really feel like I want to write, I can’t no matter how much I really want too, if I try to force it out it the word just won’t appear.

The only thing I can write about in these moments, is about not being able to write about something!  How stupid is that, it’s happened before and it’s happened again.  I had some great ideas, but zilch, just this ramble about not being able to write!

Like wise, having written this post, it came to the part where I would usually post a song to go along with the content, well the creativity or lack of it in my tired brain couldn’t find one to fit, so I share this one, simply because I like it and to be honest it fits with yesterday’s post: Finding The Peace From Within The Chaos, much better than this one, so please enjoy.

Even if the healing doesn’t come
And life falls apart
And dreams are still undone
You are God
You are good
Forever faithful One
Even if the healing
Even if the healing doesn’t come
(Even If by Kutless)

21 thoughts on “Why Can’t I Write, It’s My Night Off!!!!

    1. waynemali Post author

      I agree, just a little frustrating, I’ve found in the past never to force it out, just let it write itself, but I did catch up on a bit of sleep, so not a wasted evening.
      Wayne

      Reply
    1. waynemali Post author

      I needed that rest too, I guess Sunday’s little moment was partially becuase I’ve been so tired, so yes I caught up on some sleep, which is good.
      Thanks
      Wayne

      Reply
    1. waynemali Post author

      Jill
      I don’t think I ever will, it just works that way, it’s just so frustrating when I’m there but the words aren’t.
      But a rest is good sometimes.
      Wayne

      Reply
  1. fae713

    While you weren’t able to write all the awesome stuff you were anticipating, at least you were able to write about not writing. That’s a whole lot further along than most anyone else ever gets. One of my favorite writers, SARK, has an exercise in one of her books where she encourages one to write all the reasons why they can’t write or haven’t been able to write. It’s amazing how much writing you can do about not writing. ^.^
    Anywho, better luck tomorrow! Or would that be today since you’ll be reading this at something resembling a reasonable time. I hope.

    Reply
    1. waynemali Post author

      Hi Fae
      Thank you for your comment, it’s funny that actually it’s not the first time this has happened and the time before I ended up writing about how I formed my posts, so again writing about writing when I couldn’t think of anything to write, if you get my drift.
      I had a busy Wednesday and Thursday, so I didn’t manage to post then, I had time for a post yesterday, but it’s the first time I had chance to reply to my comments, so forgive me, I did read your comment at about 6.30 the other morning, a fairly reasonable hour at least.
      Wayne

      Reply
      1. fae713

        Life means being busy. It’s kind of funny how it ends up working out that way actually. I say good for you for making this something that you are able to balance out with everything else you’ve got going on. As for 630am being a reasonable hour, I just shake my head. You’ve my respect for getting up and doing your 530am walk and being up and about and even conscious so early in the morning. It’s an awesome quality.

        Reply
        1. waynemali Post author

          There are mornings when I don’t want to get up, but I force myself to do it, it takes some doing, but now I’ve started it, I will keep it going.
          Thanks
          Wayne

          Reply
  2. Patrecia Upton

    It is quite normal to get writers block,especially when you write everyday.maybe your brain is asking for a rest… you will be ok.
    Bless you my friend

    Reply
    1. waynemali Post author

      Hi Patrecia
      It was more frustration really, I was so looking forward to it and I had thought of some great things during the day, but when I got down to writing, I just couldn’t remember or draw on anything, but it seems normal service has resumed for the time being.
      Wayne

      Reply
  3. robin claire

    Hey Wayne!!
    My mom has died so I’m back to my blogging again and catching up with all my blogging buddies. Did you read my post here?
    http://robinclaire.wordpress.com/2013/02/01/marina-is-coming-marina-is-coming/
    and here?
    http://robinclaire.wordpress.com/2013/02/06/im-having-a-huge-crisis-of-faith-right-now/
    Sobriety is one hell of a ride!! You’re doing it buddy! This is just part of the trip. Now you don’t have a much control over yourself as you did before. Feelings will come up and numbness to feelings will come up too. All I can say is – just don’t drink. You’re doing well my dear friend. Maybe today is a day to just rest. God gives us time to just rest you know? Because He loves us so much, He provides recess between school classes – so we can rest and catch up.
    love to you my sober buddy,
    robin

    Reply
    1. waynemali Post author

      Hi Robin
      I hope you and your husband are both beginning to find some peace within. I’m sure your faith will see you through, you have been my most treasured supporter and friend, always there when I needed a word of support or a reinforcement of my faith, I have borrowed from your faith to suppliment mine on many occasions, feel to borrow from me.
      Praying for you both.
      Wayne

      Reply
  4. Teryn O'Brien

    Hey, thanks so much for the follow! It is so refreshing to find people who are honestly writing about struggles. Addictions are the hardest things to overcome, and I’ll be praying for you as you continue this journey!

    Reply
    1. waynemali Post author

      Thanks Teryn
      Being honest about an addiction is hardest thing for any addict to do, but it’s the only way to freedom, to admit your weakness before God and pray for help, it’s worked for me so far.
      Thanks again, I look forward to reading more of your blog in the future.
      Wayne

      Reply
  5. pbus1

    Hello,

    When I started working on my laptop this evening, your blog was on a tab in my already open browser. I’m not really sure how I came across your blog, but I’m glad I did. As I listened to the song you posted, my eyes filled with tears. “Even if the healing doesn’t come, and dreams are still undone, You are God.” It spoke to my immediate situation, and was truly a blessing to me. I would like to post the song on my blog. If so, I will link back to your blog in my post. 🙂 May the Lord bless you, abundantly!

    Paulette

    Paulette

    Reply
    1. waynemali Post author

      Hi Paulette
      The Lord works in wonderous ways, I am so glad you enjoyed my song choice, I always try to choose them very carefully, sometimes it take me longer to choose the song than write the post. It’s a great song and after a moment last weekend when I was a little lost it was a great reminder for me too.
      I will pray for your and know that God will be with you always.
      Wayne

      Reply
  6. Pingback: Even If | Paulette's Blog

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