Tag Archives: Beautiful

An Eight Year Old’s One Direction Birthday!

It would seem my daughter’s eighth birthday turned out to be a One Direction themed birthday, to say she has a One Direction obsession is an understatement.  Almost half the cards were One Direction, some of the clothes were One Direction and the pièce de résistance, a singing One Direction tooth brush, really who came up with that idea?

More One Direction

More One Direction

A Singing Toothbrush!

A Singing Toothbrush!

This is my favourite photo of my daughter, together with our old dog “Wylie Burp”, he would lay there and let her just sit on his back for ages, she would only have been around two years old at the time.

Best Of Friends

Best Of Friends

BEAUTIFUL by MERCYME
Days will come when you don’t have the strength
When all you hear is you’re not worth anything
Wondering if you ever could be loved
And if they truly saw your heart
They’d see too much

You’re beautiful, You’re beautiful
You are made for so much more than all of this
You’re beautiful, You’re beautiful
You are treasured, you are sacred, you are His
You’re beautiful

and Praying that you have the heart to fight
Cuz you are more than what is hurting you tonight
For all the lies you’ve held inside so long
and they are nothing in the shadow of the cross

You’re beautiful, You’re beautiful
You are made for so much more than all of this
You’re beautiful, You’re beautiful
You are treasured, you are sacred, you are His
You’re beautiful

Before you ever took a breath
Long before the world began
Of all the wonders He possessed
There was one more precious
Of all the earth and skies above
You’re the one He madly loves
Enough to die

You’re beautiful, You’re beautiful
In His eyes

You’re beautiful
You were meant for so much more than all of this
You’re beautiful
You are treasured, you are sacred, you are His
You’re beautiful, You’re beautiful
You were meant for so much more than all of this
You’re beautiful, You’re beautiful
You are treasured
You are sacred
You are His

Just A Baby, Growing Up To Quickly

Weekly Photo Challenge: From Above

Last week my daughter ran into the room brandishing a photo in her hand, when she calmed down from her hysterical laughter we found she had this picture of herself when she was just a few months old, she couldn’t actually believe it was her and that she may of actually looked like that once.

Eve

Eve

This was taken almost seven years ago, doesn’t time fly, now she’s seven going on seventeen, a real madame at times and at others the most loving little girl you could ever wish for.

There one thing she is expert at and that is giving her Dad a hug when he needs one and just lately he’s needed quite a few.

Days will come when you don’t have the strength
And all you hear is you’re not worth anything
Wondering if you ever could be loved
And if they truly saw your heart
They’d see too much
You’re beautiful, You’re beautiful
You are made for so much more than all of this
You’re beautiful, You’re beautiful
You are treasured, you are sacred, you are His
You’re beautiful
(Beautiful by MercyMe)

Sincere Thanks

As this is my 100th post and on the very day I reach 40 SoberWeeks, I want to say a massive thank you to all my fantastic friends that I have come to know through this Blog.

My last three posts have received some of the most fantastic comments I could ever wish to receive, I’ll try my best to explain why.

Question Of Faith

The idea for this one came as I was finishing another poem, it didn’t seem to fit with that one so I took the idea to started to run with it.  The vision was a question then two or three single word answers to each one, I didn’t have the questions and at that point or any answers, but I started working it through.  I started to scribble the questions into my notebook, leaving space for the answers, once I had the questions I tried to add the answers, but I was struggling, I felt I needed to pad them out to three or four words each, but I resisted and settled on what I had. As I typed it up I moved the answers around a bit, but I still wasn’t happy, something wasn’t right.  But, I couldn’t work out what so I just posted it, unhappy with it, but I went with it.

I just couldn’t believe the comments I received almost immediately, it got me re-reading it over and over again, until I started to come to like the simplicity of it and the raw answers.  I come to see these as the questions I may have to face on judgement day and the answer I would probably give, not what I had planned but that’s how it came out and the response has just blown me away, thank you so much.

What I realised was that the reason I didn’t want to post it was my own insecurity, I still see poetry as something that is not really me, but I think the response has led me to change my thinking, to just go with it, it comes from the heart and is therefore definitely part of me.

Finally Resolved – Daily Prompt: Resolved

I am sorry if I’ve caused any confusion and worry with this post, honestly this was written in reflection of the previous New Year’s Eve, facing a new year where I was losing the fight against the beast.  I am absolutely fine, thanks for all the concern, but I am still sober and I am still trusting in God for my situation with Victoria.

I have liked doing the Daily Prompts, my normal posts are usually worked out in my head whilst walking, but these I just sit down and write, no thought, they just come from the heart to the keyboard, probably the most raw posts that I do, but possibly the best posts I’ve written in my own opinion, I know this one was quite painful, I felt that when I read it after posting, but when typing I didn’t really notice, it just flowed without any real need to think hard about it.  Once again I’m sorry for the rawness of the post and any confusion or worry, but I am once again blown away by the responses, thank you again.

A Walk That Symbolises My Life

I tried to write about four different pieces of poetry yesterday, three have been temporarily abandoned in need of further inspiration, leaving this one as the only complete attempt.

The premise is simple, I see each walk I take every morning, as the sunrises, as something that symbolises my journey with God, from the darkness to the light, everyday I feel the need to make that walk, it seems to keep me on track with my journey, it’s simple and honest, what more can I say about it, but once again thank you for the responses.

So it was back to work today, which means I won’t have as much time to read all your wonderful Blogs, but I will try to get round them as much as I can.

Once again thank you for the fantastic responses, I offer you all this song.

Days will come when you don’t have the strength
And all you hear is you’re not worth anything
Wondering if you ever could be loved
And if they truly saw your heart
They’d see too much
You’re beautiful, You’re beautiful
You are made for so much more than all of this
You’re beautiful, You’re beautiful
You are treasured, you are sacred, you are His
You’re beautiful
(Beautiful by MercyMe)

Passing Christmas – Festive Test No 3

Well Christmas has rolled in to Boxing Day here in the UK, I’ve looked at this page this morning to find out what Boxing Day means after all these years, quite frankly I still haven’t got a clue, there’s no Boxing on the TV today, although I’m sure the odd fight might break out at the start of the sales today. Or is it the day we box up all those presents we don’t like or want ready to give as present next Christmas, to that Great Aunt who knitted you another horrendous Christmas jumper!

Anyway I digress, if it is Boxing Day that means I’ve made it through Christmas Day intact.

To be honest my fears of a few weeks back were really in vain as I had a good time, it all went better than I expected.

We were all up early, I decided to forgo my walk as they all got up about the same time as I usually set out. The kids dived in and soon the shredding of paper had begun and the mess formed, I grabbed the note pad I brought last weekend, for scribbling down spontaneous poetic moments, recording the events as they happened in the poem Let The Shredding Commence. Incidentally Ben slept in his onesie last night, when he woke he was desperate to know if the tail was still attached!

As Victoria and the kids readied themselves to go help with Dinner preparations at her Mum’s, I took myself off to Church. I guess that as this was my first Christmas as a Christian, this was where I felt I needed to go, as these people were key to where I am now in my recovery and rebuilding, I owed it to them to be there and honour the birth of Christ, our saviour.

After the Church service I made my way straight to Victoria’s Mum’s, it’s quite a walk so it made up for missing this mornings walk.

To be honest it was just like last Christmas and all the others before it, I was made to feel like I was still part of the family. Although at dinner I was sat with Victoria’s brothers, rather than by her and the kids, that was okay it saved any awkward feelings. We did have a bit of conversation over the table, at one point I swear our eyes met and I saw a feeling beyond the resentment, but it lasted only a moment, then it was gone the defences were back up.

The banter between the family lasted until teatime, when they all set off to their Gran’s, at that point I went home alone. I have to say as I walked through the door I had to fight with the urge to cry and breakdown, I held back the tears by reading my Blog posts from the very first one The Precipice, with that I inspired myself to be honest, until I decided to take a nap.

Just after I awoke they all arrived home, so in all honesty I wasn’t alone for long really. Eve came back with ear ache (to which she is prone) so Victoria took her to bed as me and Benny watched Harry Potter.

I made it through, no drama’s, no drink, I fought any urge to feel sorry for myself, as everything had gone better than I dreamed, maybe there wasn’t the Christmas Miracle I prayed for, but it wasn’t the complete breakdown of my sanity that I feared, so I thank God for that.  So I guess I made it through Festive Test No 3 with another pass, I’m not really sure what the next test is, but I’ll face it head on, just like I have all the others.

As a side note nobody at Victoria’s Mum’s had any alcohol whilst I was with them, which is not the norm, I do hope they didn’t abstain on my behalf, I don’t have a problem with others drinking, just myself. Although to be honest, Victoria’s brothers who usually indulge seemed to have over indulged on Christmas Eve, so I would say they were glad to give it a miss, blessed em.

Song time then, oh what shall I choose?

How did I fall, how did I run dry?
How did I lose, how did I lie?
I’m gonna let you down,
Let you down with truth
The echo of my whispers
(Beautiful by Matthew Mayfield)

This song played on my iPod just as I neared Victoria’s Mum’s yesterday morning, I know that I maybe torturing myself a little, but I can’t really help the way I feel, sorry.