My Awesome Day

I have to say that so far this has been the most awesome Easter Day ever, for me it feels like a day of total redemption.

This coming Tuesday I will be celebrating 4 years sober, which in its self is a massive achievement, that I am both proud of and thankful for the strength of God to make it through this far.

But it was the events that led up to that in the preceding weeks, that are first and foremost in my thoughts following the events of today. Eleven days before that last drink, I found myself wanting to end my own life, to give up on everything, I felt so worthless and was convinced that my family and Victoria would be better off without me. I stood facing the mirror with a knife against my wrist, going through all these thoughts of worthlessness.

Then out of nowhere I heard a voice that said “It’s better that your kids live with who you are now, than what they are going to find!”

I remember seeing a vision of myself dead in a bath of blood and knowing that my six year old daughter would have been the one to come looking and find me. After that I put down the knife.

That started the process of seeking help, praying and discovering God, becoming sober and starting to attend Church.

So today just over four years on from that day I had the amazing experience of Baptising my now 10 year old daughter. Eve asked to be baptised so Victoria asked if I could be in the pool and do the actual baptism, which I am thankful I was able to do.

It was an amazing experience and very emotional, afterwards so many people came up to say that they had shed a tear whilst watching. I am so thankful I got that chance to do this for my daughter, it was an amazing experience for her too. She recorded a testimony video which was shown on the screen, she stated she wanted to be baptised because she wanted to do something that Jesus had done!

Eve – waiting

Eve – baptised

For me this feels like I put aside some of my guilt, my torment of what I did and became, the pain of that day four years ago now seems so distant, as I say, it feels like total redemption. To be able to do this and on Easter Sunday, celebrating Christ’s sacrifice and rising from the dead, is so special.

To top it off, my Mum and Dad attended Church. My Dad is now recovering well from his heart bypass operation, he’s still not able to drive for a few weeks, so my friends from my Connect Group chipped in to collect them and take them home. My Dad stated that he usually only goes to Church for weddings, funerals etc, but I have a feeling that he actually enjoyed it, although I’m not sure he was quite ready for the way we do church, neither of them have ever been to a Church like ours before. Although I’ve got a feeling they will be back, they brought my niece too, who went into Kids Church, she absolutely loved it, so I’ve got a feeling she will want to come back too.

So roll on now Tuesday evening, I have arranged for a number of the guys from Church, who have been amazing supporters on my four year journey to join me for a meal in town to celebrate, it’s going to be a great evening, I can’t wait.

My life may not be perfect, but at the moment it feels amazing.

All because of the sacrifice of the one, the one who conquered death.

MERCY TREE by LACEY STURM
On a hill called Calvary
Stands an endless mercy tree
Every broke and weary soul
Find your rest and be made whole

Stripes of blood that stain its frame
Shed to wash away our shame
From the scars pure love released
Salvation brought the mercy tree

In the sky, between two thieves
Hung the blameless Prince of Peace
Bruised and battered, scarred and scorned
Sacred Hands pierced by our thorns

It is finished was his cry
The perfect Lamb was crucified
The sacrifice, our victory.
Our Savior chose the mercy tree

Hope went dark that violent day
The whole earth ‘quaked at love’s display
Three days silence in the ground
This body born for Heaven’s crown

On that bright and glorious day
Heaven opened up the grave
He’s alive and risen indeed
Praise him for the mercy tree

Death has died. Love has won!
Hallelujah! Hallelujah!
Jesus Christ has overcome.
He has risen from the dead.

Death has died. Love has won!
Hallelujah! Hallelujah!
Jesus Christ has overcome.
He has risen from the dead.

One day soon we’ll see His face
And every tear, He’ll wipe a way
No more pain or suffering
Oh, praise him for the mercy tree

Death has died. Love has won!
Hallelujah! Hallelujah!
Jesus Christ has overcome.
He has risen from the dead.

Death has died. Love has won!
Hallelujah! Hallelujah!
Jesus Christ has overcome.
He has risen from the dead.

On a hill called Calvary
Stands an endless mercy tree