After the frustration of last night, I can safely say that tonight is a complete 360, another Friday night at Amplified, my Church’s youth ministry and it was another epic night.
Firstly one of our young youth leaders absolutely nailed her preach, she may only be in her teens herself, but her faith is amazing, I wish I had just a little of her passion for Jesus.
She spoke of the distorted mirrors we look into, where we see a distorted image of ourselves, when we look and see that we are ugly or we aren’t good enough, we are worthless or we are weak, she told the young people present that we all face these mirrors from time to time, even herself, that we all think like this about ourselves in this way on occasion.
I felt every word she said, they resonated through me over and over again, because I faced every mirror she spoke of, only I faced them all at the same time and on more than one occasion, I stared into that mirror and got all those images of myself just staring back, all in those days when I stood at my bathroom sink with penknife in hand, these were the destructive thoughts I had and this young girl spoke every one of them tonight.
But she had an answer, an answer for every mirror, God’s mirror, for each thought she stuck God’s response through bible verse onto a mirror until she covered the mirror in God’s word for us.
She nailed it, absolutely nailed, you were incredible Annie O’Connell!
Following Annie was a testimony from young Hannah, she spoke of her torment after years of bullying, her hatred for God that He allowed her to go through that and all the self harm and some of the very thoughts that Annie spoke about.
She fought against her insecurity and spoke with strength about how she had turned back to God to get through, how in doing so her life had changed considerably, her outlook and attitude was so different now.
I still remember that on the day of my Baptism, Hannah sent me a message over Facebook, I didn’t even know her then, she had just seen me jump up on stage and share my testimony, she praised me then for my courage, this evening I got to return the compliment, she had the courage to speak her testimony for what God is doing in her life and she did it unbelievably well.
The funny thing is that I don’t see what I did that day as courageous, because I don’t feel I had anything to be afraid of, because I wasn’t really in control, God was in control that day, I had complete trust in Him that this was what I was supposed to do, I just left my shy, quiet self behind for a while, there were no nerves, as I say I had nothing to fear, I was with God.
It’s hard to believe that this weekend it will be 65 weeks since I last stared into that twisted, contorted mirror, 65 weeks since I put down that blade and 65 weeks since I picked up the phone to make that call to Gareth, from that call I started a journey with God and I continue that journey and continue to grow as I go. I may have faced the odd small mirror in the last 65 weeks, but that mass of twisted glass has now been smashed forever!
There can only be one song to accompany this post, House of Mirrors by Tenth Avenue North, there were definitely some mirrors thrown to the ground tonight!
HOUSE OF MIRRORS by TENTH AVENUE NORTH
You can’t seem to see past your own reflection
Caught up in the halls of your introspection
And you’re staring at your mirror on the wall
Asking “who is the fairest of them all?”
‘Cause Lord I know, it’s not me
If only you could see
That you’ve already been set free
Well come on, come on
Let’s throw our mirrors down
Yeah come on, come on
Let’s shatter the glass on the ground
Well you say “hold on, if I could just try this one thing.
Well I know I can change and that would change everything”
But a house made of mirrors never helped you see any clearer
It’s yourself you can’t see past
And Lord, isn’t that just like me?
If only we could see, that He’s already set us free
Well come on, come on
Let’s throw our mirrors down
Yeah come on, come on
Let’s shatter the glass on the ground
Oh, oh
Freedom’s waiting for you now
So come on, come on
And throw your mirrors down
Come on, if you’re tired take a step outside
You might find that you can forget about yourself tonight
Oh, come on if you’re tired of failed attempts to try
Freedom’s waiting when you look outside
Come on, if you’re tired take a step outside
You might find you can forget about yourself tonight
Yeah, come if you’re tired of your failed attempts to try
Freedom is waiting when you look outside
Well come on, come on
Let’s throw our mirrors down
Yeah come on, come on
Let’s shatter the glass on the ground
Freedom’s waiting for you now
So come on, come on and throw your mirrors down