Tag Archives: Kids

My Daughter’s Chored My Ferrero Rochers!

Okay, so I get home after a long day at my Karate Club grading, with the gift of a box of Ferrero Rochers, my favourite chocolates, it does seem as though some of my students listen to me endless hints!

But since then my daughter has returned home, the first thing she found was my nice unopened box of chocolates, she worked out how to open the packaging and helped herself.  Now she keeps darting back in and out of the room to help herself to some more.

This is not the first time she’s eaten some of the chocolates I’ve received as a gift, a few years ago one of the parents who went with the England Junior team to Prague, where I was an assistant coach to the team, brought me some expensive chocolates as a thank you, on that occasion as the wrappers had what looked like Disney Princess Castles on them, she helped herself to them too!

Just in case your wondering what my post title means, well the word “Chored” is Newark slang for stolen, one our wonderful slang words!

It’s been a good day, I managed to train for 3 hours, the second time this year, so I am going to ache tomorrow morning.

Last night went okay, it was my Boss’s wedding reception, I really didn’t want to go, I’m not big on these kind of events anyway, but since last November I seem to have more of an issue going out to events where others are drinking. A friend from work said they were only going for a short while and they would give me a lift, so I agreed to go, I thought that out of respect I should at least make an appearance.  It went okay, these things are always awkard, but it went by just fine.

So next Saturday is the second anniversary of my sobriety, I suppose when I started out, I wanted it to be permanent, but even then I never imagined I would make it this far and still be intact, I can only thank God for that.

WE WILL NEVER GIVE UP by SANCTUS REAL
We will not lose heart
We will not lose hope
When all we see is fading
We trust in what we know
We will never give up

Pressed on every side
Praying for escape
We can see the answer
That You’re the only way
We will never give up

We will fix our eyes on the One who will last forever
We will hold on tight to the only real treasure
We will not lose heart
We will not lose hope
We will give our lives to the One who will last forever

We were born into weakness
Fragile by design
So we hold onto Jesus
With everything inside
We will never give up

We will fix our eyes on the One who will last forever
We will hold on tight to the only real treasure
We will not lose heart
We will not lose hope
We will give our lives to the One who will last forever

Greater is the One in us
We will never give up
Power of the Risen Son
We will never give up
We will never give up

We will fix our eyes on the One who will last forever
We will hold on tight to the only real treasure
We will not lose heart
We will not lose hope
We will give our lives to the One who will last forever

We will not lose heart
We will not lose hope
We will give our lives to the One who will last forever
Forever 

Jogging Bumblebees And All That!!!

Sometimes you think things can’t get much weirder, this morning as I neared the entrance to my work I was passed by a young woman jogging, dressed as a bumblebee, not the sort of thing you see every morning in Newark, I mean, we have some weirdos but a jogging bumblebee!  I can only assume there was some sort of fun run organised for Sport Relief, otherwise, I really don’t know!

Friday afternoons I teach a couple of karate classes for the Sport Centre, the first class is for four to six year olds, which can be interesting at the best of times, today was one of those days.  We have recently managed recruited a young boy, who has a zero attention span, you need to pairs of eyes on him all the time, which means either me or my fellow instructor spend most of the lesson trying to keep him in check.

Today that seemed almost impossible, the class bordered on chaos, we managed to keep it together, but we were well relieved when it ended.  It’s saying something when the kid that usually causes us the most problems, is getting annoyed at this other kid for not doing anything remotely like what we were asking him to do!

The only problem is that when that class finishes we have the next group straight away, one group leaves and the other starts, not even a minute to regroup!  The second class wasn’t as bad, they are older and far more interested in learning, but it still has it’s moments!

Oh well, we’ve got a week to recover and then the madness starts again!

THE FIGHT by THE ROCKET SUMMER
It’s silent tonight
I’m trying to wrap my head around
If everything will be alright
And how you didn’t have to do it now

And I don’t
know how
you managed to sleep with
knowing that you abandoned me at the worst time
but I will

Fight the fight and
keep defying
I’d give up, but I keep trying
To fight the fight, 
it’s in my wiring
this is how you made me
To fight the fight
and keep on fightin’
I’d give up, but I’d be lying to me

Faith, welcome back
it’s been awhile since we hung out
have you come to get me back on track?
you know they didn’t have to do this now

But I don’t have no
Time to waste for me now
About how they abandoned me at the worst time

So I will
Fight the fight and
Keep defying
I’d give up, but I keep trying
To fight the fight,
It’s in my wiring
this is how you made me
To fight the fight
And keep on fightin’
I’d give up, but I’d be lying to me

What would I do now
if you weren’t here to pull me out?
What would I do now
If I didn’t have my friends?
What would I do now
If you weren’t here

And as the trouble chases me
Bring me guidance
Be with me to 

Fight the fight and 
Keep defying
I’d give up, 
but I keep trying
To fight the fight
It’s in my wiring
This is how you made me
To fight the fight
And keep on fightin’
I’d give up, but I’d be lying to me

I’d give up, but I’d be lying
So fight the fight and keep defying
I’d give up, but I’d be lying to me
I’d give up, but I’d be lying to me
I’d give up, but I’d be lying to me

Verse of the Day – Psalm 127:3-4

Psalm 127:3-4

Psalm 127:3-4

My kids are more than a blessing to me, at my lowest the thought of them kept me alive.

HOLY by JESUS CULTURE
Just one look on Your face
Just one glance of Your eyes
My whole world is changed
my whole world is changed

Oh I seek only to see Your face
I don’t wanna go anywhere without You God
Without Your presence
Oh let me see Your face
The beauty of Your holiness God
Take me into the holy place

And only one word comes to mind
There’s only one word to describe

Holy, Holy, Lord God Almighty

There is no one like You
You are Holy
Holy

Daily Improvements

It would seem that each day is actually getting a little easier, I am definitely beginning to feel as though I am getting back to some sort of normal again, there are still some lingering side effects, but in general I do feel a lot better.

Although I’ve been off work the last few days, I have done some work for the Architect’s which has kept me occupied and hasn’t been as stressful as it had been over the last few weeks.  I’m glad I told them any work last week would have to wait, okay I may not get any money from them for sometime, but I was at lot more comfortable working on my terms.

My frustration and anger are a lot more controllable now, I’m seemed to lose control very easily in the past month, which was one of the things I feared about looking after the kids, if they kick off how would I react, luckily they haven’t and I actually now feel I have control back.

At my Connect Group meeting last night I felt like I was part of the meeting for the first time in weeks, not completely detached and in tears like two weeks ago or a bit part player like I have been over the last month or so, my concentration is returning and I can focus now, I don’t find myself just staring out into nothing, this was something that was happening quite a bit, I would find myself just drifting off then not knowing where I was or what I was doing for a moment.

There are still things about myself I’m not happy with at the moment, I still get trapped in my own head from time to time, but on the whole I certainly feel like the medication is working and I coming out the other side of yet another trial.

The kids and I had a film night this evening, we watched Despicable Me 2 on DVD with pop corn, they want to do it again, so probably Monday night we’ll have another film night.  I have to say they have been fantastic so far, I couldn’t have asked for them to be any better behaved.

Last night I was reminded of something I was doing a few weeks back when I was at work, when things weren’t going very well and on a couple of occasions I was close to just grabbing my things and walking out, I would find myself working away from others and quietly singing a few lines from this song over and over again, it helped me get through some tough moments, it something I should keep doing.

WHEN YOU WALK INTO THE ROOM by BRYAN & KATIE TORWALT
When You walk into the room, everything changes
Darkness starts to tremble at the light that you bring
When You walk into the room, every heart starts burning
And nothing matters more than just to sit here at Your feet and worship You

We Love You, and we’ll never stop
We can’t live without You, Jesus
We Love You, We can’t get enough
All this is for You, Jesus

When You walk into the room, sickness starts to vanish
Every hopeless situation, ceases to exist
When You walk into the room, The dead begin to rise
Cause there is resurrection life in all You do

Come and consume God, all we are
We give You permission, our hearts are Yours
We want You, We want You

Time To Step Up To The Plate

So whether I fear it or not, whether the anxiety builds or I keep it under control, the time is here….

Victoria left for Gambia at 1.30am this morning, leaving me with the kids for the next 10 days.

I have to be honest and say that after the last few weeks, the thought if making a real mess of things is not helping. Although the anti depressants have began to kick in, each day that passes I feel a little more normal, but I’m still worried about messing up.

But so far the first day has gone okay, the kids woke and went to school without any problems. I collected Eve from school, they both came back home, played nicely together before I made tea, so far so good.

Eve did have some tears earlier, she didn’t realise she just couldn’t FaceTime Mummy at any time she liked, but we got through it.

It’s going to be a long ten days, all I can do is take it one day at a time and pray everything will be okay.

RISE ABOVE by FIREFLIGHT
Too much time we let pass by
Broken dreams and idle lives
Waiting on the way it ought to be
Pushing forward, falling back
Counting scars and losing track
Afraid to crash we never spread our wings
And with every chance we take we find a reason
To give up on the hope that we all need

Maybe today we all will rise
Maybe today we all will rise
Above the mistakes that we’ve made
Sometimes we’ve got to face the fall
Before we rise above it all

Can’t give up on second tries
Leave the pride that blinds our eyes
No one taught us how to say goodbye
Now’s the time for broken hearts
Embrace today a brand new start
Leave the past and let love lead the way
And with every chance we take we find a reason
To give up on the hope that we all need

Maybe today we all will rise
Maybe today we all will rise
Above the mistakes that we’ve made
Sometimes we’ve got to face the fall
Before we rise above it all

If we just lived like we mean it
If we loved even when we don’t feel it
We would suffer for a reason
And see there is more to who we are

Maybe today we all will rise
Maybe today we all will rise

Maybe today we all will rise
Maybe today we all will rise
Above the mistakes that we’ve made
Sometimes we’ve got to face the fall
Before we rise above it all

So Proud Of My Boy

Two weeks ago I took my Son to our Church youth group Amplified for the first time, he used to go to the group for younger kids before it was closed, but as he’s now 11 and in September will move up schools, he’s eligible for the older youth group which I have been attending as part of the A.V. Team.

Two weeks ago it was games in the local park, not the normal meeting at Church, so yesterday evening he came along for the first time.

Well if you’ve seen my post “Alone In A Crowded Room” then you will know how hard I find it to mix with new people, so Ben is the same, he’s shy and quiet, not a natural mixer, like me he’s okay when he’s included, but not great at being forward.

In regular Church meetings on a Sunday morning, he sits with the other from Kids Church, whilst most of the girls dance and sing along to worship, my daughter Eve included, Ben sits quietly at the side, not getting involved, when I see him from my camera position or indeed from my old seat, I see myself in him.

Also he doesn’t like change too much, in fact he doesn’t want to move school, he told has last teacher at his primary school he does not want to go to secondary school, point blank he refused to go, they managed to convince him he has to, told him to see how it goes for the first few months, then they would speak with him after that, somehow they got him to agree.

He met with a few of the kids at the park a few weeks ago, so he knew a few last night, but at times I could see him alone, but trying.

When it came to worship last night, he stood up at the front with the others, I half expected him to stay seated at the back, but he moved forward and I’m certain I actually saw him clapping along with the music.

In the social time after he stood alone a while, so I engaged in a game of table tennis with him, which he enjoyed, then he was joined by a group of others and seemed to be in thick of things, so I left him to it. By the end of the evening he knew quite a few of the other kids and had signed us up for the BBQ next Friday. I glad he’s making friends, many of these kids although older than him, go to his new school, I think it’s good for him to have some older friends he knows in his new environment who can help him.

We helped tidy up and put out the chairs out of Sunday’s service, he got involved and didn’t complain even as it got late.

Although he’s a quiet lad (unless he’s fighting with his sister) he seemed to enjoy it and I hope it will help him, both with his new school and shyness, but more importantly with his faith.

I’m proud of how he handled it last night and proud of how he got involved, it may be a small step, but it’s a start.

CHILDREN OF GOD by THIRD DAY
Praise to the Father of our Lord, Jesus Christ
Our God and our King, to Him we will sing
In His great mercy, He has given us life
Now we can be called the children of God

Great is the Love that the Father has given us
He has delivered us
He has delivered us

Children of God, sing your song and rejoice
For the love that He has given us all
Children of God, by the blood of His Son
We have been redeemed and we can be called
Children of God
Children of God

A mystery is revealed to the universe
The Father above has proven His love
Now we are free from the judgment that we deserve
And so we are called the children of God

Great is the Love that the Father has given us
He has delivered us
He has delivered us

Children of God, sing your song and rejoice
For the love that He has given us all
Children of God, by the blood of His Son
We have been redeemed and we can be called
Children of God
Children of God

We are the saints
We are the children
We’ve been redeemed
We’ve been forgiven
We are the sons and the daughters of our God

Kids, Food, Spiders & Crocodiles

Another great day with the sun out once again, so after a lazy morning, the kids and I took to the park to soak up some sun.  We had a great time, well they did especially, I sat and watch mostly, a little to old for climbing frames and swings now.

Ben found a few friends to play football with, which kept him occupied for a while, whilst Eve continued to play and the equipment, though they came together to play again, before we had a quick game of football between us.

Playing Together Peacefully

Playing Together Peacefully

We left the park for a drink at the Pub around the corner, where they then decided they were hungry and gave those sad faces until I said we could eat there, they know which faces to pull!

They both chose their meals and I chose a burger tower which they said was like Man Vrs Food or Dad Vrs Food, when it arrived they said I wouldn’t finish it, but I proved them wrong, Adam Richman would have been proud!

Dad Vrs Food

Dad Vrs Food

It’s been a great weekend with the kids, Eve in particular has kept us entertained, on Saturday her scream rang throughout the house when there was a spider in the back room, you may remember how I previously saved her from a spider, well this time she took it on herself, the tiniest of spiders was hanging from the ceiling by a single thread and she was waving a brush handle at it, widely swinging and grandly missing, so I calmly scooped up the spider and put it outside, incredibly for me without pulling off one of it’s legs.

Then yesterday morning I woke to find her walking around the house dressed in a crocodile outfit, not the strangest thing I’ve ever woke to, but pretty close!

Attack of the Crocodile People

Attack of the Crocodile People

Oh well, back to work tomorrow, lots to do as usual, but I’ll be glad to get back into a routine again, plus get rid of the extra pounds I’ve put on this weekend!

THIS LIFE by THE AFTERS
I come in to tuck her in
I’m so tired from where I’ve been, doing all I can to stay awake
As she goes on about her day, I hang on every word she says
She reaches out and puts her hand in mine
For a moment, we are here together
And it hits me that this won’t last forever

We can’t own it
We just get to hold it for a while
This life
We can’t keep it
Or save it for another time
This life

He was always there for me
Now he’s fighting just to breathe
I tell him it’s ok to let go
As I look into his eyes, I know that this won’t be the last time
But for now, we’re taking different roads
For a moment, we are here together
And it hits me that this won’t last forever

We can’t own it
We just get to hold it for a while
This life
We can’t keep it
Or save it for another time
This life

What we give is all we have
How we love is what will last
And this hope we know will carry us through
What we give is all we have
How we love is what will last
And this hope we know will carry us through this life
What we give is all we have
How we love is what will last
And this hope we know will carry us through this life
What we give is all we have
How we love is what will last
And this hope we know will carry us through

We can’t own it
We just get to hold it for a while
This life
We can’t keep it
Or save it for another time
This life

We were never meant to stay
So we don’t have to be afraid
Of what is waiting on the other side of this life

And Now!

For those who are interested, this is how my daughter looks now.

Eve Now

Eve Now

This was taken back in March, on the day she was off school sick and we went into town then to Church to help with the setting up of a conference, that was the same day I found out about my first Nanna’s passing,  she kept we sane for a while!

Look around, look around
Tell me can you see
All the wonder in the world
Is reason to believe
That there is something more
A love we can’t ignore
Behind the beauty
(Behind The Beauty by Josh Wilson)

Black Eyes, Cracked Thumbs & Black Belts

Well it’s been one heck of a long day, I am almost completely exhausted, but in a good way, it’s been a busy, tiring day, but a good one.

I started the day with a walk as usual, I was out walking by 5.30am, the snow we were expecting hadn’t materialised, but the sky was full of cloud and light drizzle, so unless they cleared there wouldn’t be another fantastic sunrise like yesterday, but that didn’t matter, I was walking, it was dark and I would once again walk into the light, that’s just how I like it everyday!

An eight mile walk this morning up the cycle track, I stopped at the lake on the way back, sat in the constant drizzle and read from the bible.  I took that opportunity despite the weather as I wouldn’t be making it to Church today, I had a karate course to attend.

The course was only in Grantham, about a twenty minute drive from my home.  The course was a National course held by our association, the training was three hours long, but I was asked by our Chief Instructor, Ohta Sensei, if I would teach a section of coloured belts, so for the first hour I taught thirty or so lower grade students, which was both interesting and fun.

For the second hour I went back and joined the other black belts, joining in with a number of free fighting drills, which was fun, despite catching my thumb, which is painful and taking a punch to the eye, which will probably be black tomorrow, I might add here I wasn’t supposed to be blocking my opponent, but to trust in their control, it wasn’t a hard punch, it just caught me in the right place, I’ve had harder, but that’s karate, it’s not tiddlywinks after all!  After that we did a bit of kata, during which I was then once again pulled out to teach a young black belt lady, who was grading for her second dan (I can’t have been that bad, she did pass), them for the last hour I joined in once again with the black belts for more kata.

So a three hour course and I taught for half of that, which I am glad of, I haven’t trained at that level this year, so it was just right, I ache now and probably will ache worse tomorrow, but I’ll still be walking in the morning!

On of my students was grading for his black belt in the afternoon, so I took my seat in the grading room and watched the proceedings, he did pretty well and after a long wait for the results his name was the first to be called to say he had passed, phew, both elation and relief, I get more nervous than my students at these things.  Another black belt to add to the club’s roster after a long day.

The first thing I did when I got home was sleep, it wasn’t a late return, but by 5.30pm I was gone, until just after seven when my kids woke me up, I could have slept right through, but I’m glad they did anyway, I had a bit of work to do.

So it’s the end of a very long day, but a very good one, I’m so proud of Morley for passing his black belt and the look on his face and the joy of his parents is enough for me, just to see that is my reward for my work.

I’ve already downloaded the podcast from our Church service, I did that within a couple of hours of the service finishing, so I have it ready to play in the morning when I walk, so even though I missed Church this morning, I won’t miss Gareth’s message and if it’s anywhere near as good as last week, I’m in for a great walk, whatever the weather and however much I ache!

So I bid you all goodnight and leave you with this song.

God of creation
You came from Heaven
You became a man
bringing hope again
You laid Your life down
Took all of our sin
Nailed it to the cross
Where You paid it all
(We Were Made For You by Aaron Gillespie)

Nativities and Prayers

Today my six year old daughter took part in her school nativity play, she played the part of the Roman Centurion, I wasn’t able to go to watch due to work, but thankfully Victoria took both pictures and video’s of her speaking part.

She had practiced for many weeks and was keen to point out to me, that her words were not written on that scroll, she remembered them all herself and can still remember them, if I want to hear them.

Thankfully no one on stage or in the audience heckled with the words “Big Nose”, Oh sorry I forgot, this was the real nativity not the Monty Python version.

My kids don’t miss a trick, this evening they had spied my presents from last night and have opened the Soda water for me, that was nice of them, well at least they asked my permission first. Oh well, just the Pepsi Max for tonight’s quiet 258 SoberDay celebration.

Also tonight it is 38 weeks since I prayed for the first time, that simple prayer to just ask for the strength to get through those days prior to my sobriety, I still keep praying for the strength to carry on and I keep finding it, even in the darker days I keep finding it.

I’ve chosen the song “I Belong to You” by Lincoln Brewster to accompany this post, due to a couple of reasons;

Firstly, I read Lincoln’s page on Wikipedia where it states Lincoln says this about his finding God:

“One night, I laid all my cards on the table. I asked the Lord to come into my life, all by myself. It was the best night of sleep I’d ever had. I was very peaceful. I think that was what enabled me to blow off that record deal.”

That quote struck a chord with me, because I felt exactly the same thing the morning after I first prayed, that I had had the best night’s sleep ever, I was at peace, even in the turmoil of my life, I was at peace.

Secondly on the day of my Baptism, we sang that song in worship shortly before the baptism actually took place, during the singing of the words below I broke down in to tears, for the second time that day my heart froze, but this time I cried, not in pain, I’m sure it was in joy, but to this day I not sure why, not really sure what brought it on, that moment of emotion, but now each time I hear that part of the song I revisit those feelings of emotion.

“You caught my soul when I was struggling to breathe
You made me whole and now Your majesty I see
I belong to You
Yes I belong to You”
(I Belong To You by Lincoln Brewster)

So tonight I will pray again, give praise for the strength I receive and pray that I may continue to draw on that strength, so I can keep on counting these fantastic SoberDays!

I will forever keep praying

I will forever keep counting