Tag Archives: Music

Just A Normal Saturday Morning At Work?

It was certainly an interesting morning, after a night watching the football (or more precisely Wolverhampton Wanderers verses Crawley) with Paul and Ally, it was once again almost midnight before I went to sleep, actually I remember laying down with the TV on and I don’t remember turning it off!

But I woke early from the middle of a dream, this time it was a good dream, I only hope and pray it was more than a dream, but alas it may just remain a dream!

Incidentally when I woke the TV had gone on to standby mode, when I passed out after drinking with the TV on previously I always thought Victoria came in and turned the TV off!  Maybe I have a TV fairy!

But before the wedding I had to work until midday, which is fine, Saturday mornings pass quite quickly, usually anyway.  We always have the radio on in the shop at work, but Saturday morning radio can be full of talking a very little music, so as I have done on a number of occasions I plugged my iPod into the radio and put one some of my music.

Although my colleagues understand that I am now a Christian and know fully about my struggles over the last few years, I don’t discuss my faith with them, it’s a builders merchants, the conversations around me don’t very often revolve around faith, not usually in a positive anyway.

Although I’ve listened to Christian music for many years, way before I even entered my dark years, my music since last April has predominantly been Christian music, previous to that it was a mixture of Rock music, Christian Rock and some heavy rock music, but not too heavy.  My favourites playlist has a range of different artists and song types, extremely diverse, so I put that on rather than my current playlist of Christian music, although all my current playlist are also on that old playlist.

What was of particular interest was what happened when a Christian song came on, in the past I’ve looked across nervously to check if anyone has noticed and whether their reaction is to turn it off, I’ve even rushed across to the iPod and skipped tracks before as soon as I realised what was playing, but today I just left it.  A number of songs came on and it was interesting to see a customer humming along to “Oh Beautiful” by Skyler Smith and Kim Walker-Smith, not a response I was expecting.

Then as I was talking with my work colleague Andy, it was plainly evident that he was tapping along to Better Is One Day by Kutless, if only he really knew what he was enjoying and tapping along to!

There was one point in the morning when the shop was quite busy, but I could hear a song playing that I hadn’t heard in some time, in fact I couldn’t even remember hearing the song before, it was off that old playlist and not my new one, I think I added it just before I changed what I listened to, however, I couldn’t recall the song, but it caught my attention, maybe because of this or maybe because of the words of the song, I moved over to the iPod to find out what it was.

Then I looked up the lyrics of the song, it was by an artist I had not attributed as Christian, a band that I had dismissed over the last 18 months, but now the song was stuck in my head.

There have been many songs that I have received at the right time, obviously Healing Begins by Tenth Avenue North is a definite point at which I can say I was sent a song that I had to listen to, a song that spoke the right words at the right time for me.  This time was no different, after the last week, the lyrics were just what I needed to hear, so whilst I’ve been at home between the wedding and the reception later I’ve just had it on repeat and why not, it’s a great song with a great message.

Take a listen, read the lyrics, I hope it encourages you like it has me today.

Summer rain falling all around you
Washing all the doubts to the bone
In the madness this world, it has created
Don’t forget you are beautiful


Someday, somewhere there’ll be a silver lining
Break through wars you’re fighting here
We both know there’s no easy way around
Do you hear my words ringing out?

There’s no higher mountain I would climb
To rid you of the fears that rule your mind
There’s no higher mountain I would climb
For you to see that I am on your side

Behind The Scenes Revamp

Going back to between Christmas and New Year I started some behind the scenes renovations that I wanted to carry out on this blog, the main one was the to totally overhaul my Music For Inspiration section, I wanted to simplify it a little and list the songs by artist.

Back then, even after only about 100 posts, it was slow process to sort and basically I abandoned my attempt and any changes to the Music page, I’ve been meaning to revisit the page for sometime, but never felt the urge to pick it up and start again.

So a little devoid of ideas of what to post this evening, I decided to pick up where I left off in January and revise that section of my blog, but unfortunately as it is a bigger task than a few hours this evening, there still isn’t much to see, but I will continue working on this and other changes over the coming weeks.

Don’t worry I don’t intend to change the content of what I write and how I write it, it will remain me, written by me, as always completely honest and completely me.

On another sadder note, some of you may remember these two characters from my post A Left Eye & The Guinea Fowl:

Sophie & James, The Donkeys

Sophie & James, The Donkeys

For over five years my first job upon arriving at work was to tend to these two lovable rogues, each morning I would put out their food, top up their water, periodically clean out their hooves, hold them whilst the farrier clipped their hooves and well the worst job relating to a pair of donkeys, is applying ointment to a male donkey’s privates, whist the other eats your jacket and you’re constantly watching that the bloody thing doesn’t take offence and kick you in the head.

Luckily for me James knew I was really there to help and refrained from kicking me in the head, but that didn’t stop Sophie trying to eat my jacket all the time, fun times and happy days.

But sadly this week I received the news that both donkeys were killed over the weekend, on Saturday morning they both escaped from their paddock and made their way across the neighbouring fields, only to find themselves on the train lines close by, where tragically they were hit and killed by the high speed London to Edinburgh train.

Having spent so many good times with the two of them, it is quite upsetting to hear of their fate, but also there is a sense of comfort that there was no great loss of life, the train it seemed continued with no significant damage and no injury to any persons.  A train hitting two donkeys at high speed could have ended in a fairly serious accident, thank God it didn’t and only two innocent donkeys lost their lives.

Rooftops by Jesus Culture
Here I am before you
Falling in love and seeking your truth
Knowing that your perfect grace
Has brought me to this place
Because of you I freely live
My life to you, oh God, I give

So I stand before You God
I lift my voice because you set me free

So I shout out your name from the rooftops I proclaim
That I am Yours, I am yours

All the good You’ve done for me
I lift up my hand up hand for all to see
You’re the only one
Who brings me to my knees
To share this love across the earth
The beauty of Your Holy Word

So I stand before You God
I lift my voice because you set me free

So I shout out your name from the rooftops I proclaim
That I am Yours, I am Yours
All that I am I place into Your loving hands
And I am Yours, I am Yours

Here I am, I stand with arms wide open
To the one, the Son, the everlasting God 


Avoiding Accidents

I’ve made no secret of how much music plays a major part in my life, although I play no instruments and sing only to traumatise rabbits on my walks into the wilderness, I have rarely gone anywhere alone in the last twenty odd years without headphones in my ears.  Over the years tastes change and songs rise and fall in popularity on my playlist.

About four years ago ,when I first got an iPod, there was one song I listened to that became one of the most popular on my playlist, in fact at was the most listen to song on my playlist at one point, but it’s the content of the song which now intrigues me somewhat.

The song was written by Nikki Sixx, former Motley Crue bassist, from the album The Heroin Diaries Soundtrack, which was based on Nikki’s his autobiography The Heroin Diaries: A Year in the Life of a Shattered Rock Star, which details his journey into heroin abuse from December 1986 to December 1987.

The song chronicles his fall back into using after a period of abstinence from heroin, starting with the echoing words, “Don’t Give Up”.

At the point in my life when I discovered the song I was beginning to drink more and more, although life hadn’t fallen apart at that time, things at home were good, very good in fact and work was still ok, I wasn’t in my own private hell at that time, but it wouldn’t be long until I reached that horizon and started to fall over the edge.

But I loved this song, why?  I don’t honestly know, yes it’s a great song, with great lyrics, but I wasn’t struggling at that point, but the song etched itself into my mind.

Did this song pre-empt my future struggles?

To be honest, I don’t know, but I was drawn to it.

By design?

I’m not sure, but I’m beginning to think it was.

As my life began to slip from my grasp and my descent into my addiction began to take hold, I abandoned the song, my conscience seemed to tell me not to listen to it, I never removed it from my playlist, but I would skip it and avoid listening to it!

My addiction had control and seemed to want me to avoid anything that may come between me and this torrid love affair with my alcohol addiction, the message of this song was one my addiction didn’t seem to want me to hear.

Over the last few weeks I’ve been going through some of the songs on my iPod that I haven’t listened to in sometime, this one came up on the list and took my by surprise.

It played again on my iPod the other morning, as I walked by the lake on the way to work, it made me think why I subconsciously moved away from the song, why I avoided listening to it, why, when the message of the song is so vivid did I not want to hear it?

Addiction is a powerful thing, it really is amazing to see what lengths people will go to protect their addiction and also to feed their addiction.  In the back of your mind you know it’s wrong, you know you’ve got to snap out of it, but the addiction seems to be stronger than the will, the will to escape is smothered when we try on our own.

I honestly believe it is possible to escape from addiction by your own free will, but I didn’t have it, I was slipping on my own.  I found the will power to make that call to Gareth, I started the process of overcoming, but even then there was an urge to throw the phone away, to just delete the number, to runaway from it all again, but I at least found the strength to make that call and start a process of fighting my addiction.

I couldn’t have made those first steps to recovery without that phone call, the subsequent meeting Gareth and Alex, then the wonderful friends at Everyday Champions Church that have been by my side through this fight, but more importantly that phone call to Gareth brought God into my life.

Through prayer I found the strength to start the resistance, to begin the fight, to take those first steps out into the light, to climb from the bottom of that wretched bottle and start to breathe again, to live again.

Don’t worry about me, I certainly haven’t fallen of the wagon, I still firmly on it, I may slip back into my own mind and suffer for it, but I have the strength now at least to avoid the need to rush to shop to find my escape from the despair, I’ve found away beyond that now.  Yes I have low days, but through prayer and the friends I now have surrounding me, I don’t need to slip into my bottle to find a way out anymore.

I don’t intend to fall of this wagon, I’m on this wagon for the ride and I’m not getting off, but there is plenty of room on here for anyone that wants to join me.

Don’t give up
It takes a while
I have seen this look before 

It’s alright
You’re not alone
If you don’t love this anymore

I hear that you slipped again
I’m here cause i know you’ll need a friend

You know that accidents can happen
And it’s ok, we all fall off the wagon sometimes
It’s not your whole life
It’s only one day
You haven’t thrown everything away

Take some time
Learn to breath
And remember what it means

To feel alive
To believe
There’s something more than what you see

I know there’s a price for this
But some things in life you must resist

You know that accidents can happen
And it’s ok, we all fall off the wagon sometimes
It’s not your whole life
It’s only one day
You haven’t thrown everything away

Don’t give up
It takes a while
(Accidents Can Happen by Sixx AM)

Glory To God Forever by Vicky Beeching

I really love this song and have been looking to include it within a post for sometime, but again the age old problem, I couldn’t find a video on youtube, I started making one a few months ago, but never completed it, but after a great day at Church early today, I came home and decided to finish it, to just simply pick an image and go with it.

I hope you enjoy the song as much as I do.

Glory to God
Glory to God
Glory to God forever
Creator God You gave me breath
So I could praise
Your great and matchless name
All my days all my days
So let my whole life be
A blazing offering
A life that shouts and sings
The greatness of the King
Take my life and let it be
All for You and for Your glory
Take my life and let it be Yours
(Glory To God Forever by Vicky Beeching)

Heaven Breaks by Sleeping At Last

I heard this song this morning whilst walking, it was the first time I’ve listened to it in some time, I simply love the beauty of the song.

As usual I couldn’t find a lyric video, so I’ve made one of my own again, enjoy.

When heaven meets the earth
We will have no use for numbers
To measure who are and what we’re worth
When Heaven meets the earth
We will have no need for mirrors
To tell us who to be
And where we fit into this awkward point of view
(Heaven Breaks by Sleeping At Last)

Ever Close To You – Pocket Full Of Rocks

As part of my post last night, Mountains In Your Path?, I was desperately searching on YouTube for a video to a song that I had been listening too over the last few days, I song that had caught my attention and match the content of the post, but alas, YouTube failed me, there was no video at all, let alone a lyric video.  So not to be out done, I’ve made my own again and I post it here for you to enjoy.

Traumatising Rabbits

I’ve stated before my love for both music and walking, every morning I get up at 5.30am, put on some great music and just walk, I love it, it sets up my day and gives me balance.

Sunday morning I get up even earlier, I get up at 5.00am, no Sunday morning lay in for me anymore, Sunday is my most important day now. So Sundays start at 5.00am, I get up walk up the biggest hill in town, as I do every morning, then back down the hill and along an old train track, which is now a cycle track.

The whole journey is about 13 miles and takes just under 3 hours at my speed, so I can get a good walk in, get back home, have some breakfast and a bath, then get ready for Church.

It doesn’t matter where I walk, I’ve always got my music on, the great thing about that time of day is that there is rarely anybody else about, especially on the cycle track, so I’m free, I’ve got the whole place to myself to enjoy the sunrise and the beautiful Sunday morning.

The cycle track has an abundance of wild life, mainly birds and rabbits. The rabbits, literally hundreds of them, scamper around before me as walk, diving across the track, in and out of their burrows either side of the tarmac walkway.

But I can get a bit carried away, when a particularly powerful song comes on I just have to sing along, wave my arms around in a kind of freaky dance, I just let go, nobody can see me, apart from the rabbits! “Deliverer” by Vicky Beeching is a one of my favourite songs to walk and sing along to, it’s a great worship song for a Sunday morning walk, although the rabbits don’t seem to appreciate my version.

Deliverer come set me free
Break every chain holding me
Deliverer come have Your way
I surrender to Your rule and reign
(Deliverer by Vicky Beeching)

You know what it is like when you’ve got ear phones on, you tend to talk alot louder than usual as you try to hear yourself over the music in your ears, well singing is no different, I sing loud just so I can hear myself. But as I do this the rabbits stop and stare at the weird site approaching them, before turning tail and running away. I can see that real look of a scared rabbit, as if caught in the headlights of an on coming car.

Traumatised rabbits, the legacy of my Sunday morning walk.

I’m so sorry my furry little friends, I mean you no harm, I just can’t help myself, I know my singing is absolutely atrocious and I know it’s early on a Sunday morning, but I promise I will try to be a little more considerate in the future.