Tag Archives: The Reason

Verse of the Day – Psalm 111:10

Psalm 111:10

Psalm 111:10

Only when we find God, do we begin to find a sense of who we truly are and who we can be.

THE REASON by LACEY STURM
All my life I’ve searched
For something
To Satisfy
The longing in my heart
And every time I’d come away…
Emptier than before…

And now I finally see The Reason
‘Cause I was made to be yours alone

You formed my heart with your own hands
But I just could not understand
If I gave you my life
I’d be healed by your grace
I was made, for your love
And gave others your place…

I’d spent my days giving my heart away
To anything new
Only to ache from the, poison
Of my temporary muse

And there were times I’d cry myself to sleep at night
Only to wake up, wishing that I didn’t

And now I finally see the reason
‘Cause I was made to be yours alone

You formed my heart with your own hands
But I just could not understand
If I gave you my life
I’d be healed by your grace
I was made, for your love
And gave others your place

Thank you for never giving up, on me
When I looked to everything else
And lived, so selfishly
You bled, you died
To be with me
Why would you do
Something like that?
For someone like me?

And now I finally see The Reason
‘Cause I was made to be yours alone

You formed my heart with your own hands
And now I finally understand
That I gave you my life
And I’m healed by your grace
I was made
For your love
That no one can replace
This is it, I won’t miss…
Everything I am made for!

To be yours…
All yours…

 

Verse of the Day – Romans 8:1-2

Romans 8:1-2

Romans 8:1-2

Even in the hard days, I am still thankful for the sacrifice of Christ which set me free.  SoberDay 999 and counting.

THE REASON by LACEY STURM
All my life, I’ve searched for something to satisfy the longing in my heart
And everytime, I come away emptier than before

And now I finally see the reason
‘Cause I was made to be yours alone
You formed my heart with your own hands
But I just could not understand
If I gave you my life
I’d be healed by your Grace
I was made for Your love
And gave others Your place

I spent my days giving my heart away to anything new
Only to ache from the poison of my temporary muse
And there were times I’d cry myself to sleep at night
Only to wake up wishing that I didn’t

And now I finally see the reason
‘Cause I was made to be yours alone
You formed my heart with your own hands
But I just could not understand
If I gave you my life
I’d be healed by your Grace
I was made for Your love
And gave others Your place

Thank you for never giving up on me
When I looked to everything else and lived so selfishly
You bled, you died to be with me
Why would you do something like that for someone like me?

And now I finally see the reason
‘Cause I was made to be yours alone
You formed my heart with your own hands
And now I finally understand
And I give you my life
And I’m healed by your grace
I was made for your love that no one can replace
This is it
I wont miss everything I am made for
To be yours
All yours

Verse of the Day – Daniel 4:2

Daniel 4:2

Daniel 4:2

This verse more than any other sums up this Blog for me, to share the amazing things that God has done for my life.

THE REASON by LACEY STURM
All my life
I’ve searched for something to satisfy the longing in my heart
And everytime, I come away emptier than before

And now I finally see the reason
‘Cause I was made to be yours alone
You formed my heart with your own hands
But I just could not understand
If I gave you my life
I’d be healed by your Grace
I was made for Your love
And gave others Your place

I spent my days giving my heart away to anything new
Only to ache from the poison of my temporary muse
And there were times I’d cry myself to sleep at night
Only to wake up wishing that I didn’t

And now I finally see the reason
‘Cause I was made to be yours alone
You formed my heart with your own hands
But I just could not understand
If I gave you my life
I’d be healed by your Grace
I was made for Your love
And gave others Your place

Thank you for never giving up on me
When I looked to everything else and lived so selfishly
You bled, you died to be with me
Why would you do something like that for someone like me?

And now I finally see the reason
‘Cause I was made to be yours alone
You formed my heart with your own hands
And now I finally understand
And I give you my life
And I’m healed by your grace
I was made for your love that no one can replace
This is it
I wont miss everything I am made for
To be yours
All yours

The Reason by Lacey Sturm

I was so please this morning when I woke to find the book I had pre-ordered a month or so ago had downloaded to my phone.  I did intend to get up and walk this morning, but I found myself reading the first few pages and then getting so engrossed in the book, if I wasn’t supposed to be at work I would have stayed there and read the whole thing.

I’ve read and heard part of Lacey’s testimony before, which if you haven’t please take a moment to watch this youtube video.

I’m still only part way through, but I am thoroughly captivated by a story of young girl who hides in the darkness, who runs and hides in the shadows, turning away from God, but she also highlights the point we all need to know and that through it all God was with her in the darkness and the shadows, it’s well worth a read.

THE REASON by LACEY STURM
All my life
I’ve searched for something to satisfy the longing in my heart
And everytime, I come away emptier than before

And now I finally see the reason
‘Cause I was made to be yours alone
You formed my heart with your own hands
But I just could not understand
If I gave you my life
I’d be healed by your Grace
I was made for Your love
And gave others Your place

I spent my days giving my heart away to anything new
Only to ache from the poison of my temporary muse
And there were times I’d cry myself to sleep at night
Only to wake up wishing that I didn’t

And now I finally see the reason
‘Cause I was made to be yours alone
You formed my heart with your own hands
But I just could not understand
If I gave you my life
I’d be healed by your Grace
I was made for Your love
And gave others Your place

Thank you for never giving up on me
When I looked to everything else and lived so selfishly
You bled, you died to be with me
Why would you do something like that for someone like me?

And now I finally see the reason
‘Cause I was made to be yours alone
You formed my heart with your own hands
And now I finally understand
And I give you my life
And I’m healed by your grace
I was made for your love that no one can replace
This is it
I wont miss everything I am made for
To be yours
All yours

Verse of the Day – Romans 6:22

Romans 6:22

Romans 6:22

It’s been three weeks since I stopped taking the anti-depressants, I feel again, more free than ever before.

I have to say I love this song, I’ve heard it so many time, yet it still made me shed a tear this morning.

THE REASON by LACEY STURM
All my life, I’ve searched for something to satisfy the longing in my heart
And everytime, I come away emptier than before

And now I finally see the reason
‘Cause I was made to be yours alone
You formed my heart with your own hands
But I just could not understand
If I gave you my life
I’d be healed by your Grace
I was made for Your love
And gave others Your place

I spent my days giving my heart away to anything new
Only to ache from the poison of my temporary muse
And there were times I’d cry myself to sleep at night
Only to wake up wishing that I didn’t

And now I finally see the reason
‘Cause I was made to be yours alone
You formed my heart with your own hands
But I just could not understand
If I gave you my life
I’d be healed by your Grace
I was made for Your love
And gave others Your place

Thank you for never giving up on me
When I looked to everything else and lived so selfishly
You bled, you died to be with me
Why would you do something like that for someone like me?

And now I finally see the reason
‘Cause I was made to be yours alone
You formed my heart with your own hands
And now I finally understand
And I give you my life
And I’m healed by your grace
I was made for your love that no one can replace
This is it
I wont miss everything I am made for
To be yours
All yours

Verse of the Day – Psalm 68:35

Psalm 68:35

Psalm 68:35

In the darkest of times, I am thankful for His sanctuary and the strength to make it through it all.

THE REASON by LACEY STURM
All my life I searched for something 
To satisfy the longing in my heart 
But everytime I come away emptier than before 

And now I finally see the reason 
Because I was made to be yours alone 
I’m giving you my life, so take me 
‘Cause I could never live without you now 
I’m giving you my life so take me 
‘Cause I could never live without you now 

There were times I cried myself to sleep at night 
Only to wake up wishing that I didn’t 

And now I finally see the reason 
Because I was made to be yours alone 
I’m giving you my life, so take me 
‘Cause I could never live without you now 
I’m giving you my life so take me 
‘Cause I could never live without you now 

Thank you for never giving up on me! 
When I looked to everything else but you 
You bled and you died to be with me! 
Why would you do something like that 
For someone like me? 

And now I finally see the reason 
Because I was made to be yours alone 
I’m giving you my life, so take me 
‘Cause I could never live without you now 
I’m giving you my life so take me 
‘Cause I could never live without you now 

Now I finally see the reason 
Because I was made to be yours alone

Thoughts On Two Years Of Sobriety – Yes It’s Today!!!!

So the hours are running down now until the magical moment when I can celebrate another year of sobriety, when that clock ticks over to 10.30pm, even though the rest of the house maybe asleep, I will be having my own quiet celebration with a bottle of Pepsi Max (shameless product placement)!

When I made that conscious decision two years ago, as I walked to the Pub with a friend, that declaration that if I didn’t like the taste of that first pint that would be, did I really think it would stick?

Did I really expect to make it a year, let alone two years?

Quite honestly I don’t think I did.  Since the age of sixteen the most I have gone without a drink at that point was a couple of months.  I know I made that declaration with the best of intentions, but I am actually surprised that I’ve made it through these two years without relapse, without failing and returning to the bottle.

I’ve been close, I honestly have, within a few weeks of quitting I was tested, then last March, when my Nan died, I was struggling and it felt like it would be easier to give in, but I prayed and I fought it and I made it through the urges.

When my second Nan died just two months later I didn’t really have the same urges, but a strange thing happened when I came home from her funeral.  A few years ago my kids brought me a keyring of Barney Gumble from the Simpsons, complete with beer in his hand, the keyring had been on my keys ever since.  When I came home and locked the gate behind me, that keyring broke and fell from my keys, I threw it away.

I believe was the breaking point of the habit, because after that I haven’t been tempted again.  Even last November when I slipped into a depression, I never actually contemplated it, completely the opposite, when I went into shops where wine bottles were I had to stop myself from smashing them, not drinking them!

I’ve celebrated with the kids today, Eve, Ben and myself went to Lincoln after I finished work.  It was a bit of a belated treat for Eve, I didn’t have the money to get her much for her birthday a few weeks ago, I promised her when I did I would treat her in Lincoln, I managed to get some money in this week, so I kept my promise and off we went.

Amongst another of things she chose, she brought herself a pair of pink headphones, on the way home on the train she couldn’t wait to try them out, so we plugged them into my iPhone and she was away.  She insisted I play one song over and over for her and then she started singing along.

Eve Singing The Reason

Eve Singing The Reason

We got a few strange looks!

The song she was singing along with was The Reason by Lacey Sturm, I had actually chosen that song to go with this post.  I can relate to every lyric of the song, it echoes my feelings and my journey, but I have finally found the reason and without that reason I would not have made it this far.

THE REASON by LACEY STURM
All my life I’ve searched for something
To satisfy the longing in my heart
But every time I’ve come away
Emptier than before

And now I finally see the reason
Cuz I was made to be Yours alone
You formed my heart with Your own hands
But I just could not understand
If I gave You my life I’d be healed by Your grace
I was made for Your love and gave others Your place

I spent my days giving my heart away
To anything new
Only to ache from the poison
Of my temporary muse

There were times I cried myself
To sleep at night
Only to wake up
Wishing that I didn’t

And now I finally see the reason
Cuz I was made to be Yours alone
You formed my heart with Your own hands
But I just could not understand
If I gave You my life I’d be healed by Your grace
I was made for Your love and gave others Your place

Thank You for never giving up on me
When I looked to everything else and lived so selfishly
You bled, You died to be with me
Why would You do something like that for someone like me?

And now I finally see the reason
Cuz I was made to be Yours alone
You formed my heart with Your own hands
And now I finally understand
And I gave You my life and I’m healed by Your grace
I was made for Your love that no one can replace
This is it, I won’t miss everything I am made for

To be Yours
All Yours

Getting Back Into The Routine

After almost two weeks off work, looking after the kids whilst Victoria was in Gambia, it was back to work yesterday morning and with it came a welcome return to some of my routines.

I have to say, after the stressful month or so that I had been going through, it was good to be off work and get a bit of down time and of course spend some extra time with the kids, but I am one of those people who needs a little bit of routine, it’s kept me going over the last year or so.

Over the couple of weeks I did do some extra work for the Architects, still not been paid yet, but it gave me a little bit to do during the days, rather than just stay at home alone.  Most of the first week I was off I was out for a few hours at least, which just broke the days up and kept me from boredom.

But then in the second week I had two days, Tuesday and Wednesday where from dropping Eve off at school and picking her up later, I had absolutely nothing to do.  That’s when I get a little bit lost, I felt so low on those two days, maybe it was boredom, maybe the feeling of being alone, maybe the memories of the lost days when I had no work and nothing to do, when I would just be waiting for the golden hour when I could indulge in my drinking habit.  Unfortunately last week I found myself just lounging around, doing nothing but watch TV and waste the time away, getting lower and lower.

All the other days I had something to do and I was fine, really quite positive, but those two days with nothing to do, I was lost and low, then with that all those positive routines I had put into place of the last year were slipping a little.  I forgot to take my medication on more than one occasion and only remembered later in the day!  But I did take it everyday and if I am honest, despite the low days, I never had any temptation to drink, that is one thing I can say I have overcome and is absolutely not slipping!

It was good to be back work, although a little bit of shock to the system, although I’m sleeping a little better, I still wake earlier than usual and at odd times in the night, so it caught up with me yesterday, then today it’s been a twelve hour shift, with a couple of hours after work at the Architects, so I mentally tired/stressed as well as physically tired.

After Lori Mosley’s message on Sunday, I came across this song by her daughter last night and fell in love with it instantly, I can definitely relate to the lyrics and well worth a listen.

THE REASON by LACEY STURM
All my life I’ve searched for something
To satisfy the longing in my heart
But every time I’ve come away
Emptier than before

And now I finally see the reason
Cuz I was made to be Yours alone
You formed my heart with Your own hands
But I just could not understand
If I gave You my life I’d be healed by Your grace
I was made for Your love and gave others Your place

I spent my days giving my heart away
To anything new
Only to ache from the poison
Of my temporary muse

There were times I cried myself
To sleep at night
Only to wake up
Wishing that I didn’t

And now I finally see the reason
Cuz I was made to be Yours alone
You formed my heart with Your own hands
But I just could not understand
If I gave You my life I’d be healed by Your grace
I was made for Your love and gave others Your place

Thank You for never giving up on me
When I looked to everything else and lived so selfishly
You bled, You died to be with me
Why would You do something like that for someone like me?

And now I finally see the reason
Cuz I was made to be Yours alone
You formed my heart with Your own hands
And now I finally understand
And I gave You my life and I’m healed by Your grace
I was made for Your love that no one can replace
This is it, I won’t miss everything I am made for

To be Yours
All Yours